I was talking to a friend of mine this morning about her financial goals for the year. After listening to her for a few minutes, I interrupted to ask how she felt about those goals.
There was a long pause. Finally, I asked if I could share my thoughts about goals - why I don't set them for myself, and why I think they're terribly limiting and frustrating.
I had been in the right place at the right time for her, and had helped her see a new way of approaching her business, her clients, and her whole life - a way that felt scary, but spacious and even inspiring in ways that traditional goal-setting just can't achieve.
By the end of the call, she was in tears, and I nearly was.
Are you ready to try something new? Here's what I shared with her; I hope it will be as inspiring to you.
Goals are like Boxes
When you were a kid, it was fun to play in big packing boxes. But squashing your life into one is a very different feeling. And that's what goals do.
I've observed over and over again, with myself and with clients, that setting goals creates limitations - and panic! Once a goal is set, you immediately start thinking about it; you can't stop thinking about it. Everything you do is focused on achieving the goal. My friend saw all her potential clients as walking dollar signs- not very comfortable for her or for them!
Will everyone think I'm a failure?" Then, as my friend commented this morning, there's always the "Oh, I didn't really mean that" thing that happens when a goal starts to feel unreachable.
"How will I meet my goal? What happens if I don't succeed?
On the other hand, when you finally reach your goal you think, "Ahhh... I achieved it. Now I can relax." And you put your feet up and take a deep breath. Whether you do this literally or figuratively, you've stopped. What amazing things would happen if you kept going? You'll never know.
An Invitation to Be
So I asked my friend, "Who would you be if you weren't so focused on financial goals?"
There was another long silence, but this one was full of electricity - I could almost see the exclamation marks flying in her thoughts. Finally, she said, "I don't know!"
"I've asked myself that question before," she added, "but it's always been what would I do. I never thought of asking who I would be."
Just as I've seen people box themselves in with goals, I've seen them set themselves free with an intention to be.
When you start with an intention to be something special, to be more of who you really are, the goals you might have set are nothing compared to what you'll actually receive, accomplish, and experience.
Set your intention with commitment and heart, even when it frightens you.
The more powerfully you set the intention, the better. Set an intention that stretches you, that pushes you out of your habits, that makes you feel nervous and vulnerable.
What she didn't know was how amazingly rewarding it would be. She received gifts of friendship, service, joy, peace, and love that have changed her life forever, in ways she could not have imagined.
I know someone who was always giving. Immensely generous of spirit and in action, she felt threatened and vulnerable in receiving. When she set an intention to be someone who receives as well as giving, she knew it would be challenging.
And all she did was set the intention - and then she noticed whether she was being in alignment with that intention.
What will you be?
what are goals
for more info visit http://lord-abnev.com/WHAT%20ARE%20GOALS.com/
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
what are goals present Breaking Down Your Goals
In effect, each of these steps represents a mini-goal, and each of these mini-goals can be broken down further if necessary into more manageable chunks.
Do not become obsessed with achieving each minor step on your way to the major goal. You may find that some steps can be skipped, some become unnecessary, and that new steps appear. Review these minor steps regularly as they will change often.
Now you’ve just done this quick exercise, and you should never leave the scene of a decision without taking some action, so go do something to get yourself on the path to your goal!
An example may be that you want to buy a farm in the country. You know nothing about farms. You may break your goal down into something like:
1) Find out about farming – is it for me and what does it involve?
2) What sort of farms are there and which type do I want?
3) What is the best area for the type of farm that I want?
4) How much money do I need to buy the farm
…
…
…
Buy the farm
This is a very simple illustration of breaking down your goals. Each one of these may be broken down further into actions you can take.
Now you realise, that the journey towards a goal starts with a single step, and is made up of many steps. A wise Chinese sage once said, “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.”
Wise words? But what do they mean to someone who is trying to achieve their goals in life? That’s what we’ll be talking about in this article.
I am sure that you have some big goals in your life. Perhaps you want a mansion in the countryside, a sports car, or your own boat.
I am also sure that you may well be looking at this goal and thinking “How the hell am I going to get that?”
And this is where our wise philosopher comes into play.
Pick one of your major goals that you don’t know how to achieve and examine it more closely. Think about the goal and you will realise that it is made up of a number of smaller goals, each of which is in turn made up of other smaller goals.
Grab a piece of paper, write down a major goal at the top, and below it, write down the steps you can take to achieve this goal.
what are goals
for more info visit http://lord-abnev.com/WHAT%20ARE%20GOALS.com/
An example may be that you want to buy a farm in the country. You know nothing about farms. You may break your goal down into something like:
1) Find out about farming – is it for me and what does it involve?
2) What sort of farms are there and which type do I want?
3) What is the best area for the type of farm that I want?
4) How much money do I need to buy the farm
…
…
…
Buy the farm
This is a very simple illustration of breaking down your goals. Each one of these may be broken down further into actions you can take.
Now you realise, that the journey towards a goal starts with a single step, and is made up of many steps. A wise Chinese sage once said, “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.”
Wise words? But what do they mean to someone who is trying to achieve their goals in life? That’s what we’ll be talking about in this article.
I am sure that you have some big goals in your life. Perhaps you want a mansion in the countryside, a sports car, or your own boat.
I am also sure that you may well be looking at this goal and thinking “How the hell am I going to get that?”
And this is where our wise philosopher comes into play.
Pick one of your major goals that you don’t know how to achieve and examine it more closely. Think about the goal and you will realise that it is made up of a number of smaller goals, each of which is in turn made up of other smaller goals.
Grab a piece of paper, write down a major goal at the top, and below it, write down the steps you can take to achieve this goal.
what are goals
for more info visit http://lord-abnev.com/WHAT%20ARE%20GOALS.com/
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